Saturday, October 26, 2024
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Confluence

Dear Angry White Woman: Four Things To Do Instead of Dialing 911

Reading Time: 4 minutes Let us be very clear on one central point here. People of color are at risk of being killed by the police at a much higher rate per capita than white people. That’s not an opinion. It’s a fact. The ONLY way a person of color can one hundred percent be assured they will not be shot by a cop is to not encounter one. Black and brown people know that.
Yes, dear angry white woman, when you decide to make your world right by forcing the cops into an encounter with a person of color, you are putting that person’s life at risk. While you might not have thought about that, now you know. So, before you dig your phone out of the nether regions of your purse to make that call, count to 1000 and get yourself in check.

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Confluence

How to Spot a Lie

Reading Time: 4 minutes I always say you want to be in a relationship with someone who has one personality. They are awesome in private and in public. They are exactly who they say they are no matter what’s going on around them. We like to give people the benefit of the doubt. We don’t want to be “too picky”. However, if you want the love of your dreams, be uncompromising. Choose like your life, or at least the life of your dreams, depends on it because it does.

THE PEOPLE WE LET CLOSEST TO US NEED TO BE WORTHY OF RISKS WE TAKE WHEN WE FALL IN LOVE.

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Confluence

Enlightened Boundary Setting

Reading Time: 3 minutes Enlightened boundary setting is about figuring out what you want instead of what you don’t want. Decide very specifically what experiences you want to share with someone and set the bar there. You get to choose. How good to you want it to be? If things start drifting off script, unplug and try again later, or not. However, when you’re dialed down on what you do want with your clear intention set, you are already about one hundred times more likely to enjoy the ride.

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Informed
Confluence

If It Quacks: Opinions are Important, but Facts are Facts

Reading Time: 5 minutes You can decide your own opinion, but you can’t decide your own facts. And the fact is that there is a definition for abuse, just like there is a definition for fascism, for authoritarianism, for dictatorship, for tyranny. It’s shocking to me how many parallels there are between our current political climate and living in an abusive relationship – from the gaslighting to the total lack of respect – respect for norms, for human dignity, for women, for the truth, for the rule of law.  

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Informed
Confluence

Learning to Engage in Human Difference 101

Reading Time: 5 minutes I believe all white people are racists. Hold on. Don’t switch off. Hear me out. When I say all, and I mean “ALL” white people are racist, I am saying each of you have benefitted from the ill-gotten gains of racism, because you have benefited from the system being designed by y’all, for y’all and to y’alls benefit. No matter how bad you feel about this, your tears do not put me on an equal footing with you culturally or systematically. 

And I am going to need to you to process this and get your life together because we are in this together. Get over your personal guilt and the attack you feel. It is not about you. Kinda sorta. But no. Those feelings you are experiencing are your soul saying you have a role in getting this together and healing this wound that is in your orbit. Therefore, learn. Dig deep. Process guilt. Do not let white women’s tears derail this process. Tap into your power. 

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