Musings on Obligations + Self-Prioritizing
By: Jacqueline Gates Confluence Daily is your daily news source for women in the know.
I just took a 2-mile walk this morning, at way-earlier-than-usual o’clock, in 55-degree weather, to go feed my daughter’s cats.
I’m going to do the same thing this evening.
And it might be raining.
But I’ll still go.
Here’s the ridiculous significance of this …
Since we left Savannah, HusbandMuffin and I haven’t been doing our morning walk – because 55 degrees is “too cold” or i the timing is inconvenient or whatever-other-reason-comes-up.
In other words, in this particular instance, I’M PREPARED TO DO MORE FOR MY DAUGHTER’S CATS THAN I AM FOR MYSELF!!
Obviously, this is the front-of-mind example but I’m seeing this pattern everywhere …
– We’ll get up early + give up weekends to earn a buck, but can’t find an hour a day to make art or write that book or finish that degree.
– We clean the house for guests, but not just to make ourselves happy.
– We push through illness + tiredness, rather than stopping to recuperate.
Now to be clear, I’m totally happy to look after the cats.
In fact, it’s been rather lovely to be out each morning + evening. We stopped off for breakfast yesterday + intend a coffee/cake date this evening.
And of course, I get that there’s plenty of times where we have to do stuff we’d rather not for the good of those we love
(like getting up at sparrowfart to get our kid to speech practice) or for the health of our wallets
(my darling husband soldiered through 6 years of a horrendous commute so that we could stay in a good school district).
There will always be times when we put others’ needs/desires before our own.
That’s the rhythm, the give-and-take of life.
I get that.
But it’s nonetheless a pattern worth exploring.
What I’m questioning is why I’m not as willing to ‘stretch’ myself as much when it’s for MY OWN good?!
Why my own health isn’t worth the discomfort of an early morning walk in less-than-balmy conditions, but the health of three cats is?
I’ve gotten much better at self-prioritizing over the past few years, and I have the luxury of not having to tend to small people 24 hours a day.
But today has revealed a nuance that I hadn’t seen till now.
What am I doing for others that I can’t be bothered to do for myself, but would be life-altering if I did?
My health is my greatest treasure.
It deserves my greatest investment if I’m to have the energy + time-on-this-planet to do the work I want to do. I intend to be here as long as possible for my husband + my kids + my grandbabies.
If I can walk 2 miles in chilly weather for 3 furbabies,
I can walk 2 miles for my own long-term well-being.
What about you?
Can you see areas where you do things for others that you don’t for yourself?
What would change if you fulfilled your promises to yourself with as much devotion + heart-centered generosity as you do for your employer/kids/committee/friends?
Jacqueline Gates has mastered the art of applying theatrical skills to anchor and amplify the manifesting technique known as acting-as-if. Because when you begin LIVING-as-if you already are who you secretly dream of becoming, it won’t stay a secret very long.
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